You've been cooped up indoors for the past half-decade surfing the Internet. 
Your hair has grown down to your feet, the pizza delivery guy is your only source of direct human contact, and your mother has been telling her friends that you're on business in Europe.
We don't blame you; we blame your awful desktop computer.
Your PC-addicted existence is getting more pathetic by the day, but you just can't bear to tear yourself from the beckoning glow of your computer screen.
Well, we've got the perfect suggestion for you - buy a laptop! With a laptop, you can actually be out in the sun as you're checking your e-mail on a minute-by-minute basis.
And with a laptop, you can reclaim the life you once had!!!